Why have I got a Square Peg?
Why me? Why is my child a square peg? Why does it feel that I’m the only one? Was it something I did?
These are the questions I’ve been asking myself time and time again. It’s taken a long time for me to come to terms with the fact that Edward is Autistic. Even after the diagnosis I kept thinking that he’ll grow out of it, that any day now he’ll wake up with a software upgrade and catch up with his peers but no….he is still around 2-3 years behind them.
So of course I’ve been tormenting myself by asking the unanswerable questions, what causes autism? Was it because I was on blood pressure medication during my pregnancy? Was it because he was a week overdue? Was it because of my age? Was it because he had a temperature at 7 weeks old?……But now I think why am I even stressing myself out over these questions because I will NEVER know why Edward has autism and Matthew doesn’t.
How have I come to terms with this then? Well anyone who has ever met Edward however briefly has fallen in love with him. He is just so adorable and hilariously funny. Everyone he meets he makes them smile and this is such a special thing. He finds EVERYTHING joyful and it’s infectious! ❤️
He most certainly is adorable !
hey Sophie. never think that something went wrong. I think you were chosen to have Edward because you are such an amazing mum. cherish his specialness. he will fill your life with fun and laughter.
take care xx
I certainly agree with this. My family and I have spent time with Edward and birthday parties etc and we are all very fond xx
Oh just look at that smile! I haven’t met Edward, but I love the twinkle in his eye. I’m the sort of person who second guesses everything too, but I am sure he is who he’s meant to be. And I think you’ve got a gem right there. #itsok
Having a square peg can be difficult at times, but it can also be very rewarding. I have two (out of five) and however challenging I always manage to notice the special things they bring to the family. There is no reason why we end up with children like this, just enjoy the good times and you’ll cope with the bad. x
I can imagine I’d be the same, questioning everything – but by the looks of things Edward is amazing! That smile. Thanks for linking up to #Its OK again. You managed to remember what to do! 🙂
I drove myself mad trying to work out what caused it. I couldn’t understand how my first child didn’t have it but my second child did. But now I’ve realised that I will never be able to find out so I just had to come to terms with that. Edward brings so much joy to everyone but he is exhausting. Xx
You know what I have realised in the last year! That we are by no means responsible for our children’s “difficulties”. My son has been diagnosed with EXTREME anxiety, it took me 3 years to put him on medication (which I now regret)… There is a beautifullness (for lack of a better word) within each and every one of our children. Others may not see it, but we do, and that is all that matters. It might be exhausting for us at times, but we have been given these amazing little minds to love and nurture, and after battling for 6 years to fall pregnant, I am happy with what I have been given. I love my son dearly, and through his anxiety, I have grown to be a better person. He came into this world to help ME become a better person, and I will always be grateful for that! Thank you for sharing yourpost with us! Your little man has the most infectious smile! #itsok
I can imagine I would feel the same. My daughter doesn’t have autism, but there are so many things about her that I don’t understand, and wish I did. I also question what if, or maybe it’s why? But whatever the questions, or answers, I wouldn’t have her any other way. Hugs.
#itsok
Lots of love! 😀 It’s hard sometimes to parent children who are a little bit different, but you are doing the best you can. I hope you are getting lots of support, some days can be very hard. xx
Thank you! It has been very tough but getting some more support now. Xx
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